Old Master Enthusiast Gifts

"Why, Giambattista Tiepolo, you old so-and-so! Who knew you could paint?"

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

'Plimbco Bank &Trust, Old Money Division.'

"What old school? This is my life."

"You never told me your dad was so delightfully old-fashioned."

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

'I'm old enough to remember when smiley faces were right side up.'

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

"I put my faith in coal. Because there’s no fuel like an old fuel."

Abacus.

'Do you know what I miss? - Chalk talks!'

"Damn Pope Gregory and his new calendar."

"I'd like to make a return."

'I was 'Sweatin' To The Oldies', and I flipped over on my back!'

'Honey. . . I'm ommmmmmmmmmmmmmm.'

Art Museum: Our exhibit of forgotten masters continues with What's His Name...

'I was a multi-millionaire back when it meant something.'

'I almost read an instruction manual from cover-to-cover once.'

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

'Beat it! I've got a computer!'

"That's just the meds kicking in."

"I've gone for a retro phone."

"Yeah, I'm selling my bowling balls. Free delivery to anyone who lives downhill."

"He refuses to watch the NEWs - living as he does, in the past."

"Err... Excuse me Sir, you've forgotten the user manual for your super mini mobile."

"They just don't make 'em like Doc Malone anymore!"

"I know it's a little old-fashioned, but I'm a Capricorn, and I thought it would be romantic if I carried you over the cusp of our First House."

Workers constructing barcodes

Michelangelo Caught Creating Graffiti

"Sorry, I double-booked. This wouldn't happen if I had a computer - but they insist we do everything by hand."

"Well, I think it takes a lot away from the Old World charm!"

"We don't let computers mess up your medical records. We do it by hand."

"I would rather you not email me your answer!"