Old Masters Enthusiast Gifts

Francisco Goya

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

'Plimbco Bank &Trust, Old Money Division.'

"What old school? This is my life."

"You never told me your dad was so delightfully old-fashioned."

'I'm old enough to remember when smiley faces were right side up.'

"...We've traced your lineage all the way back to a 15th-century East European Count."

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

Alice in Wonderland - Painting the Rose Tree.

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

"I put my faith in coal. Because there’s no fuel like an old fuel."

'Do you know what I miss? - Chalk talks!'

Abacus.

Peace on Earth

"Why, Giambattista Tiepolo, you old so-and-so! Who knew you could paint?"

"I'd like to make a return."

'I was 'Sweatin' To The Oldies', and I flipped over on my back!'

Art Museum: Our exhibit of forgotten masters continues with What's His Name...

'I was a multi-millionaire back when it meant something.'

"It's too good. I think it's going to be a forgery, not just a copy."

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

"I've gone for a retro phone."

"They just don't make 'em like Doc Malone anymore!"

Michelangelo Caught Creating Graffiti

Workers constructing barcodes

"I know it's a little old-fashioned, but I'm a Capricorn, and I thought it would be romantic if I carried you over the cusp of our First House."

A bomber dropping paintings "Art Bombing"

Moby Dick: Pop-Up Version

"Sorry, I double-booked. This wouldn't happen if I had a computer - but they insist we do everything by hand."

"Well, I think it takes a lot away from the Old World charm!"

"We don't let computers mess up your medical records. We do it by hand."

Whistler priming his mother before painting her.

'You can tell it's good by the way the tonsils follow you around the room.'

"Look darling, a wandering minstrel."

"I would rather you not email me your answer!"