Old Car Aficionado Gifts

Faulty car.

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

"What old school? This is my life."

Excess Baggage: In the old days folks called 2 weeks with 4 kids in a non-air conditioned car a vacation.

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

'It seats two comfortably.'

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

It's great for pulling the birds!

Route 666

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

Inflating Boobs.

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

'Never, Ever...drive 56 mph on a 55 mph freeway in a sporty red convertible.'

(I ride a harley, I drive a porsche, I smoke cigars, I drink martinis...) (So, ….You're impotent?)

"Because you're a mechanic, we're going to do your hydrotherapy in a car pool."

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

The tinman was hoping his wife liked the new muffler he bought her.

"Nothing serious - just some twenties stuck in your crankshaft."

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

Smile

Dave's Discount Auto Repair...only an arm or a leg, not both!

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"