Antique Car Aficionado Gifts

'What are those brown marks?' - 'The original rust.'

This one looks as if it's survived the chrome age.

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

"What old school? This is my life."

Excess Baggage: In the old days folks called 2 weeks with 4 kids in a non-air conditioned car a vacation.

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

'If he's only five years old, how come he knows the words to 'See the USA in your Chevrolet'?'

It's great for pulling the birds!

Route 666

'A 50's vintage automobile...a billiards room. YOu, my firend, have got it all.'

'My old Nehru suit! And in a pocket there's still a bottle of aftershave lotion from the glove box of my '55 Nash Rambler.'

"This car is a retro classic. Instead of a USB outlet there's a cigarette lighter."

Smile

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

Dave's Discount Auto Repair...only an arm or a leg, not both!

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

'Like the 'Cobra' and the 'Viper', my car is named for a snake too - the 'Rattler'.'

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

Tyre speaking to psychiatrist: 'I've been under a lot of pressure.'

"I think my dad really, really cares about me."

"It'll need a carburettor transplant, a right wing panel augmentation, and an engine oil transfusion... Maybe you should consider euthanasia."

"The major obstacle to your big dream...is your tiny wallet."

"Ladies! Ladies! Do you wanna roll my Mercedes..."

A train's dining car is a diner.

'Let me look at that map...'