Oil Painting Admirer T-Shirts

"I would like a tube of lemon yellow, cadmium red, cobalt blue, ivory, black, and zinc white, a sixteen-by-twenty canvas, a couple of brushes, and that book 'Painting in Oils'."

"Why don't you find a museum!"

Barcode on Ancient Greek Vase

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

"Me? How about you go closer and read the plaque!"

'Evidently, one of them was a cartoonist!'

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

Picasso: The Early Years

"I was going to call it 'Empty Plinth', but then I settled on 'Winter's Smile'...I wanted to capture the 'nothingness' of an 'absence of anything'..."

Cats at private view

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

"A wise choice sir! Aah. . . Da Vinci - a genius of the Renaissance and a man who changed the face of art forever! Would you like that as a bookmark, a pencil sharpener or a fridge magnet. . . ?"

Mimi's final scene

"What did Jesus order?"

Diego Velasquez

"Stick Figure" "Stick Figure II" "Stick Figures" "Stick Figure: The Reawakening"

Joe Biden

Trilby - 'The sweet melodic phrase.'

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."

Phoenix

Kultural K9's.

Man blending in to his chair is reading Optical Illusion Monthly magazine.

Shell Fire

'Must be the lesser known Easter Egg Island.'

When cartoonists drink too much coffee.

Tragedy, Comedy & Selfie.

I'm not sure which, but he's just invented either writing or vandalism. (Published originally on Feb. 11, 2011.)

"Feel better, dear?"

Sold! For £42,000 to the... No wait - it's the wrong way round!

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

The Thinker?

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

"Move, Gary."