Offshore Drilling Gifts

'The Gulf Oil Spill'

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

Impatient Oil Drillers LTD.

'You Americans call it 'Illegal Tax Evasion'? Well, here in Europe, we call it 'Monaco Effect Investments''!

"It's wonderful, Harry! How late does Neiman-Marcus stay open?"

Panama Papers Scandal

'OK, what's the first thing we need to capture in our Job Safety Analysis?' 'Don't tick off TINY!'

Cover story: Oil Workers Monthly.

'Sir, we've drilled so deep this time that we've reached Arab oil.'

'The tropical tax haven where he offshored his business was just hit by a tsunami.'

'To be honest, I'm not sure if a HAZARD ASSESSMENT would have seen this one coming!'

'I need the welder to fix the guard on that pump.'

Pummping oil on troubled waters.

"Bad news, Beatrice - I struck oil on the south forty."

'We geochemists did very well before there were geophysicists.'

Demand For Oil

Oil Workers

Oil gushes out of a oil derrick on a computer screen.

"We have half your money in bonds and annuities, the other half under an oak tree in the Caymans."

'About my accrued holdiay pay...can you mail it to my offshore account?'

'By now, some of you have probably noticed the little fracking operation in the staff break room.'

'What do you mean don't tell anyone, we'll keep it in the bathtub?'

"My job couldn't be automated so they shipped it overseas."

"I've hidden my nuts in an offshore forest."

'Isn't that nice, honey? Our money sent a postcard from the tax haven!'

Turbine Escape

Footprint on Alaska

Safety: 'When Can I Work On My Own?'

"We're a strategic region! We're a strategic region!"

'It's oil spill. We must be near civilization.'

'Wait, that's not a robotized worker, that's Al Gore checking things out.'

'Today's safety topic is HELICOPTER SAFETY!'

'I notice you're claiming non-domicile status, Mr Bull...'

Just another day at a British Petroleum cafeteria.

"And how long have you been in oil?"