Office Seeker Gifts

'Office amenities' dangled by 'Leasing agents'

Businesswoman Empowerment

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

How are you at decision making?

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

'You say you were King of the Jungle, but it seems your experience is mainly in savannah grassland...'

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

"I love you in a suit. You look so... employed."

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"Don't get the wrong idea about those years in a mental institution. I was employed there."

'Think of this as a window of opportunity.'

Do you have any other skills?

'Do you do self-deprecating humour?'

Between Offices

"I don't like your application."

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

'Don't start timing me yet! This staple won't come out!'

Opening the door to new customers

In and Out Sourced.

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

'A short economics test - if you bought something for

'Someone important is bound to see my resume now!'

"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"