Office Lifestyle Gifts

"I work hard and I play hard."

'Martha, pencil in some spontaneity this Friday at 2PM for me, would you?'

'For the busy modern man, the executive body stocking. Even the shoes are attached.'

Screensaver view.

Frustrated at the office.

'You told someone I was away from my desk. That's way too much information.'

"I need to lose weight to fit into my workout clothes."

"It's called a treadmill workstation, not a stationary rat race."

"Wouldn't you get a lot more work done if you switched to a different type of software?"

"Joey, are you on break again?"

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"My email is down... talk to me."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

In basket-case.

'That's our mission statement.'

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'