Office Kingpin Gifts

"I'm large and in charge. Well ... okay. Truthfully, I'm just large."

'It's my company, I'll decide whether I want to go to the partner's meeting or not.'

You gotta hand it to the old man, he still knows how to motivate!

The Complete Book of Baby Names. Oooh, what do you think of 110101110110? Isn't that cute?

'You can't put him out to pasture - he owns the pasture!'

"I know you think this sort of thing is nonsense sir, and I hate to prove you wrong. But according to my crystal ball, you're not going to give me the raise I'm about to ask for."

"Hey, …. what's not to like?"

'Sure, we pay them for protection but there are unexpected bonuses: nobody can tenderise veel like Luigi or slice beef as fine as Vinny.'

Mr. Blok goes bowling.

Will work for Food Network.

'I think it's past its sell-by date.'

'CPA's' evolving into 'Consultants'

"If they don't show up soon I'll have to admit I forgot to invite them."

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

'Building Inspectors During Their Off Hours.'

"I say this as a friend, Tom...we always know when you're bluffing!"

'Where do I see myself in five years? Well, doing your job of course!'

"Try not to loft the ball so much.'

'Don't tell me we've been following the wrong light!'

Worker doing impression from the end of Titanic.

Safety Pin

'Granted, you're the boss at home, Doris, but around here I'm the boss, I really am!'

Whisk

'Man, I hate it when he goes crowd surfing.'

'Here lies one of THE GREAT contract negotiators...it says so in the fine print.'

'My name is John and I'm a workaholic!'

"Mia Farrow would find the time!"

"When we selected our keynote speaker, he had not yet been indicted for SEC violations."

'Well,there's why your refrigerator's having temperature problems ma'am. The door's got a badly worn seal.'

'Have you been buying useless football memorabilia off the internet again?'

"This is my lawyer, my lawyer's lawyer and my lawyer's lawyer's lawyer!"

"He's the big dog."

7th Monkey Business Conference: 'Thanks, but I don't need the microphone: I'm a howler monkey...'

'I don't hold grudges... that's why I have lawyers.'

Two porters carry a king