Office Gossiper Gifts

'I know you're a temp. I'm only looking for a temporary liaison.'

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

"That one shows our office cliques."

Terry had a computer bug.

'I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, can do my job, but has no interest in having my job.'

"Goodbye, Cruikshank. We leave you to contemplate the wisdom of messing with big dog!"

"WIFI, Amazon, credit cards. Pretty much every password is named after me."

"The camera is mounted on your desk for a reason. There's been some paperclips missing, and we think you're the culprit."

'My salary increase got a few oo-hs.. but no ah-hs..'

'See Dick sleep on job. See Dick get fired.'

"Remember that requirement that you work without supervision? Forget it."

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

'...need to design something to bridge the generation gap.'

Office Politics Superstore.

London merchant telling a young employee that if he does not change his behaviour his career will go badly and he may end up becoming mayor

Their bubble-boss seemed completely unaware of the toxic work environment.

'We don't have anyone here by that name. Was he perhaps using one of his aliases?'

'Put simply, we need our website to tell consumers all about our company without really telling them anything about our company,'

"I've got your letter in front of me now, sir."

Jenkins! Why is it everything in this office is voice-activated except you?

'There's nothing like a spot of golf practice to take your mind off business,Smithson...'

In case of panic, push button.

Larry's snout was as clean as a whistle...this made some a little edgy.

"Find out who put a 100 dollar bill in the suggestion box. This person has potential!"

Charles P. Muckenspucker - Mission Creep.

'Harlow, do you wnat to be part of the problem or part of the coverup?'

"It was just a little setback - but the boss had away of making seem much larger."

'You cal it loyalty, we call it Stockholm Syndrome!'

'Oh, I worked hard on solutions for a time but finally realized I was cut out to be part of the problem.'

"You forgot my Diet Cola."

"If there's no further old business, we'll move along to new business."

'Firing workers is a craft, exploiting and bullying them is an art.'