Office Gambling Guru Gifts

I want you to give this project the same energy and enthusiasm you give the pools syndicate and the office lottery.

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

"As the executor for your mother's estate, let me say that she loved each of you, but she also loved Las Vegas."

The deadly sport of cobra staring contests.

Dog in casino.

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

'They say that poker is a sport. I hope they don't start testing for steroids.'

'No, you can't play poker tonight! The last time you played, you lost Schewig-Holstein!'

Everyone agrees: Aunt Juanita needs a man.

The Epsom Derby - Bookies

Casino. Keno. $$$. Win. Cashier. He sure wins a lot! He's "Keno Savvy."

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

'What's the point of a bookmakers if there's nowhere left that sells books?'

Destination casinos...

'I told you I'd deal with your transfer request, Jenkins. Cut the deck!'

"Oh, I almost forgot: This time, if you have a good hand, don’t say, 'Meowee!'"

'I need to find a loose machine like that.'

"And for only $19.99 I can give you my super bowl pick."

Tonto Casino.

"It's lotto fever."

"I've invented the wheel. We're going to be rich."

The Derby- Horse Auction at Tattersall's

'Well, I can't find anything in the rule book about it.'

"Lady here wants to put £5 on Cambridge 'Each way'!"

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

'Las Vegas: What happens here, is a lot less than what was happening here two years ago.'

"Spend a pound, lend a pound, risk a pound and shed a pound."

Wayne Krasnicky - unlucky gambler and unlucky in love.

'Today's Odds' sign above a copier showing various odds for machine's malfunctions

'Do your homework! - You gotta learn math if you want to be a bookie!'

Unnatural Selection.

'This is the third one today. Why can't the gynecologists have their convention someplace other than Vegas?'

"Oh boy! I've won the- "

STRIP Hambone: Betting on horse racing with the company payroll

'You've got a degree in mathematics? Well, the economy isn't logical. It's about irrationality, superstition, gossip and pure luck. You need a degree in gambling and black magic.'