Office Diplomats Gifts

It had taken nine months, but Jim was finally ready to go back into his boss's office and claim his raise.

'Never meet the problem head on, Ms. Pryor.'

UBLIC RELATIONS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY BREAK GLASS

'Stop mumbling, George! We all had to start somewhere...'

'We're so downsized, we have to outsource our office gossip.'

"I hope these reviews don't make you nervous."

"If it gets tense in here I might need you to step up and BS-calate things."

"I'll give you a 30% cut in snide comments about your weigt in return for 45% reduction in your arrogant misogyny."

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"I need to see your budget proposal."

Inclusive speech

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

Career Choices

"It looks like the 'because I say so' has it."

'Here's another one that'll make you blow your stack.'

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

'Would you be interested in attending a stress management seminar?'

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

Office meeting

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."