Office Comic Reader Gifts

"Something's wrong, Larry—I can tell by the way you're firing me."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'Remember only you can prevent forest fires.'

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"Relax. I just had a vitamin."

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

The Amazing Man-Spider

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'Yeah, I agree: It's hard to impress females by looking virile and strong when you're all pink...'

'Excuse me could you please direct me to the nearest toilet?'

The Salmon Run

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

'Enough already. It's a car, not a transporter.'

Time Machine Collision

X-ray Psychology.

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'

'Perkins, we're getting rid of some of the dead wood around here.'

Fish snorkling above water.

wattle covers

"How many darn burritos did you eat?"

Meet Grant, he came up through the ranks.

"Unless one is a humorist, Haskins. One should avoid attempts at humor."

'I think it's about time we tell him he's adopted.'

Muhammad Ali publishes a popup book.

"My doctor said I'm not getting any younger. I'd like a second opinion."

Sign that says 'This is not a sign.'

'I understand they specialize in acquisitions.'

'Yes Mr Hare, you were right: He IS on steroids!'

"Good boy, what a good boy. You're hired."

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

"I'm excited to get fixed at the vet, had no idea I was broken."

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

A bird that is also the helmet from a suit of armour (or is it a bird inside a helmet?). Notice the very small flying bird/helmet in the background.