Office Accessories Gifts

Two stressed drinking birds

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

The Computer Bore

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

That shows business confidence.

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

"Read our contracts, Ms Donahue. It says 'No Sexual Harassment on the workfloor!'"

Men's business romper.

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

"No, kid, we don't call these 'attachment icons.' We call them paperclips."

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

"Good morning. Fen, Boscage, Bracken & Spinney."

Joust Sharpener

"And best of all, it comes fully loaded!"

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

'This plant which you brought to me from your office snubs all my other plants.'

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

The new contract didn't leave him much room to maneuver his hoverdesk.

'Dog eat dog.'

Home Business - Electric Stapler.

"Here's to non-electric sharpeners."

Executive golf with Newton's cradle

'ANOTHER Shakespeare play?!! Look, all we wanted was the user manual for a sandwich maker.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'Never trust emails. You can't shred them.'

Stationery Shop

"Sorry to interrupt, Mr. Barksdale, but you're scheduled to take time out to smell the roses."

Another environmentally correct office product: The executive desk/organizer-fish ladder

Barnum & Bailey's Three Ring Binder