Oceanic Oil Painter Gifts

'Oil painting is fine, but I can't do watercolours, obviously...'

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"Yes, it's oil-paint: It's difficult to find water for watercolours around here..."

"I'd like to have my teeth scrimshawed without being, you know, harpooned."

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

'That's the problem with living with an artist, the fruitbowl is always off...'

'Another nice wave.'

"Yes, we're supposed to sing, but not Rap!"

The Hudson River School of Art.

'We need to update our gravel, install a fake treasure chest, and get one of those lifelike scuba divers. Apparently, it's all about curb appeal.'

'There goes the world's largest fish.' (fish bowl)

The synchronized shower event.

Rainbow violin surfers

'Say, this is interesting.'

"What kind of naval blockade is this?"

'Well, at least the landlord can't complain about a flat fish!'

Mona Lisa Laughs At Viewer

Violinist on a surfboard

Diver disguised as a fish

"Not a problem Miss: If it's too tight, I'll open it up a bit for you..."

Replacements for Paul the Psychic Octopus

Ronald couldn't grasp his instructor's insistence on his using oils rather than his preferred medium, watercolour.

Starving Artist

A fish playing a harp made out of fish poles.

Goldfish

"You may think you look cool, but can you actually breathe properly with that stupid cap on?"

He had the idea after visiting the aquarium.

"Can you get a bit off - the last three ships you did went down head first."

'I hate it when my paint runs.'

"Why am I always attracted to women with an unpredictable, dangerous energy crackling under the surface?"

A parrot misdemeanour sees some plank walking action.

'Foreign exchange student.'

"I'm not sure I brought enough blue."

Surfer holds an umbrella to keep dry.

Fly fishing