Occupational Specialist Gifts

'This is the age of specialisation - you can't be a hunter AND a gatherer.'

"This ringing in your ears, have you considered it may be work-related?"

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"I suppose just climbing the greasy pole is no longer an option..."

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

"I suppose you want the rest of the day off!"

'We've cut and pasted your list into 84 arbitrary sub-lists. Well, our work here is done.'

Time Out For Teddy

Speed of assimilation VS New team members

Office Ergonomics.

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

Oh no ... Outsourcing

'Yeah, the job's got great benefits, but mainly I like the safe work environment.'

Medical Examinations.

'In my day, we didn't concern ourselves with wimpy notions of workplace ergonomics.'

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

"This report says a happy workforce is a productive workforce, but I need more proof before I go changing everything around."

We're one big happy family here. What I'm looking for is a man who can make it work.

The Hive, Inc. Think safety! 17 days without a honey boo-boo.

'Qualifications aside, Mr Thumb, this is the cutest resume I've ever seen.'

Urine Catcher

The Department of People waiting for Something to Happen...

"Let it go. You have to learn to pick your battles."

'It was accidentally reversed one day and our profits immediately skyrocketed.'

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

"They never told us what carrying twenty times our own weight would do to our knees."

Proctologists' Office Party Games

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

'I'm telling you, I don't have a good feeling about this.'

'The bad news is you have a disease that only a highly-paid specialist can pronounce.'

Personnel,' Possible candidates'-'That'll be the day'.