Observation Enthusiast Gifts

A brand new day finds Fred, as usual, happily sitting on the sidelines of his own life.

"Did you notice anything else about the man who tripped you – other than he was short and beginning to go bald?"

"He's no hat and all corgis."

Beaver tower

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

Exciting potato bugs.

"He doesn’t say much, but he thinks a lot."

"Stargazing sure is less painful at night."

Hospital Departments

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

"Hurray! I discovered a new planet!"

"Some day, we should bait our hooks."

"I don't need your resume. Your current employer forwarded me a ton of security video that you're featured in."

'Now watch our sales increase.'

"I think he just ashed on me."

Musical Eye Test

"Office of quality assurance"

'No cheating'

Spy Satellite

"Of course I attend the meetings but I'm more of a lurker,"

Sheepdog Security

A child and a babysitter gazing out of a window

"I knew there was something wrong when he stopped reading the obituaries."

Super-ego Surveillance

'You've haed the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

'He's so fast he has to stop to clean the insects off his glasses.'

I believe there is something wrong with Tommy: He has perfect eyesight...

The Manipulation of Justice

'Hey, look how tiny the Earth appears through this end!'

'Watch this space.'

Our occupations? I am a student of The Contemporary Scene and my friend, here is an observer of The Passing Parade.

Header: Franchising of Optometry Caption: 'With every new pair of glasses you get a cheap plastic toy of a character from the latest kids movie'

"It took all day, but we finally got there."