Obedience Orchestrator T-Shirts

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

Marv was trying to teach Rufus how to be a REAL retriever.

Zombie pet tricks.

Dog Training Academy and the Cat Anarchy Club.

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

'Mac, I told you last week a collar and a tag aren't enough - there's a leash law in this town.'

Dog Training.

"Let's try 'roll over.' We can come back to this."

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"

"Sorry honey, I'll be late. The boss told me to stay."

'We're not interested in loyalty,but we do value obedience.'

"Does he need to be healed or heeled?"

'Going to Puppy School is so old fashioned Dad: I can do the course through open learning now...'

'Okay, let's try it one more time...slippers...slippers....'

'Let me put this in dog terms: Woof! Woof! Bark! Bark! Bow-wow-wow!'

"It concerns me when you say he doesn't come to you when called."

"House training's not so bad - you soon get used to it and, if you play your cards right, you'll get lots of treats."

Dog watching show called, 'After Obedience School Special'

Caution: Feeding the dogs under the table leads to the next inevitable step.

"How may times do I have to tell you to flush? Gosh, will I ever get you potty trained?!"

Obedience School - Scratch Before Entering.

"I actually know more commands than I respond to."

'I tried to teach him to shake, but he'd rather do 'high fives'.'

"I'd like to help him, but honestly I have no idea who the good boy is."

"No, I said 'sit'."

Woman to dog: 'This is you, Rex! Now start acting like you're registered!'

The Dog Breeder and His Son

"Out! Damned Spot!"

The perfect relationship

Puppy school vs. kitten school

'Jump, Tunnel, Pause Table, I suppose getting exercise outdoors could be fun, too,'