Obedience Lessons Gifts

"Let's try it again. This time with a tad less mania."

'Hello, doggie obedience school?'

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"Bad dog."

"We've found a marvelous trainer for Rex."

Agility God

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

Zombie pet tricks.

Dog Training Academy and the Cat Anarchy Club.

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

Jump Boy!God, your life must be dull.

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

Balloon dog training

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

'He's never going to graduate. How about giving him an honorary degree instead?'

'Mac, I told you last week a collar and a tag aren't enough - there's a leash law in this town.'

Dog Training.

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

"I'm taking a gap year and then getting my Master's in Fetching and Staying."

'I want a dog who will fetch my things, so don't sell me one that drools.'

'I'm tired of sitting and staying.'

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

"In obedience school, I was voted 'Most likely to chew a slipper'."

"Let's try 'roll over.' We can come back to this."

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

"Not until you fetch the other one."

"Sorry honey, I'll be late. The boss told me to stay."

"Text!"

"What, again? You've gotta be kidding me!"

'Going to Puppy School is so old fashioned Dad: I can do the course through open learning now...'