Obedience School Gifts

Veterinarians: Back in 5 Min. Sit! Stay!

'Okay, let's try it one more time...slippers...slippers....'

"You want me to sit down for this news? I haven't learned to do that yet."

Nicole's liberal dog college: 'We believe there is a gray area between good dog and bad dog.'

"I'm taking a gap year and then getting my Master's in Fetching and Staying."

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"Bad dog."

"We've found a marvelous trainer for Rex."

Agility God

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

Dog Obedience School: 'I think we're going to have our work cut out with this one.'

Zombie pet tricks.

Dog Training Academy and the Cat Anarchy Club.

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

Jump Boy!God, your life must be dull.

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

'The months of arduous training were worth it, she makes a decent martini.'

Balloon dog training

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

'He's never going to graduate. How about giving him an honorary degree instead?'

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

"In obedience school, I was voted 'Most likely to chew a slipper'."

'I want a dog who will fetch my things, so don't sell me one that drools.'

Dog Training.

'I'm tired of sitting and staying.'

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

"Let's try 'roll over.' We can come back to this."

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

"Not until you fetch the other one."

"Sorry honey, I'll be late. The boss told me to stay."