Obedience Training Enthusiast Gifts

"A simple command. She gets right to the point. I must obey. Still...I see that rolled-up newspaper as a threatening gesture designed to humble and instill fear. Therefore, later, while she sleeps. I will chew up her other shoe."

"I'm sure he does bring you your slippers and your morning paper, but that still doesn't make him a service dog."

How paper training can affect puppies...

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

Things to do: 1. Sit 2. Stay 3. Sit 4. Stay

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

"We've found a marvelous trainer for Rex."

Agility God

"Shake! Good Dog."

'Guess who just graduated cum laude from Sunnydale Obedience School?'

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

Dog Training Academy and the Cat Anarchy Club.

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

Zombie pet tricks.

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

Jump Boy!God, your life must be dull.

"I do what they tell me, I eat what they give me. How do I know they're not a cult?"

Balloon dog training

'Mac, I told you last week a collar and a tag aren't enough - there's a leash law in this town.'

'He's never going to graduate. How about giving him an honorary degree instead?'

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

'I want a dog who will fetch my things, so don't sell me one that drools.'

Welcome to pet obedience school. We're going to have fun and get these darlings into shape. Obey-Wan-Ken

'I'm tired of sitting and staying.'

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

'That beagle sure is a tough case!'

"What, again? You've gotta be kidding me!"

"Text!"

"Sorry honey, I'll be late. The boss told me to stay."

'Going to Puppy School is so old fashioned Dad: I can do the course through open learning now...'