Novelty Item Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Please enter your pin now.'

'Our founder.'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'The only problem is they're glued together. So I can't see the watch...or change the dead calculator batteries, but it's guaranteed for life...'

Family heirlooms that will never make it onto the mantelpiece.

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

'Now what?!'

'We have a tour every hour, on the hour, Sir...'

Who'd have guessed that the season's mast have item would be big springy shoes.

'These new metal detectors are great!'

"I got it in a novelty shop. But it has decreased loitering around the watercooler with 29%!"

"Krazy straw"

'The valentine card I gave you talks, plays music and flashes lights! Who cares about the message???'

"Rats! It doesn't work...but why?? Why??!!"

'It even tells time in metric minutes.'

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

The Hooligan.

Leaking backpack.

Thinks Bob: At last, the most practical house pet since the goldfish.

'I did say we were going to give you transport...I didn't say what sort!'

"I didn't waste lockdown. I did my own facelift."

Drinking Hats

"He must like you. He wants you to share his whoopie cushion."

Spontaneous Combustion Man - Open with care

Shoppers of Mystery.

Fakirs uses a back scratcher.

101 uses of a dead cat: desk spike

Frank Loved Bubblewrap

Girl who has been bought an oversized chatelaine large household items hanging from it