Novelist Fan T-Shirts

'Bront?saurus.'

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

"You're going to hate yourself."

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Meet The Author"

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

Nathaniel Hawthorne

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

The DaVinci Code

Thomas Mann.

Reading my Critics

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Honoré de Balzac

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

Jean-Paul Sartre

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Television Readers.

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

Silence of the Chickens...

John Bunyan

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

Characters jumping out of a book.

Pets are reading the book 'Animal Farm'.

"Well, we needed the rain."

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

Duke of Clarence (Later William IV) Promenading with Family

'Stuck on a desert island, in the middle of the ocean, with only a palm tree for company, it's a bloody joke.'