Nouvelle Cuisine Enthusiast T-Shirts

"It's nouvelle cuisine sir, so you'll need a magnifying glass..."

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

'Your stab at ordering the wine in French went well.'

Garlic Free Zone.

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

"Regular service or affected?"

"I think foie gras is French for endless buffet."

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"Gigot de sept heures."

'Two famous French wines.' 'Red and white.'

Kentucky Fried Horse

Cooking with Pierre

"And finally the chef's surprise - the check!"

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

Fast Nouvelle Cuisine.

'Here's a good one, France on 2000 calories a day.'

Octopi a la mode.

"Interested in some romantic punk rock during your dinner?"

Roadkill Restaurant

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

'The escargots are underdone.'

Inappropriate garnish.

"The insect menu is very popular nowadays."

French man holding a dish.

"So nice to see things 'a la financiere' again."

Garlic, the wonderful stinking rose.

'Your French dip, sir.'

"For this dish we'll need to sauté the onion with the week-old, moldy, ant-covered French fry over medium heat. Then, we lightly flash boil our dehydrated mouse..."

'Madam, we do not discuss Julia Child at Maison Henri.'

'Perhaps monsieur found the Vichyssoise 'crunchy' because the soup bowl was not edible.'

"No thanks. I had a cracker in April."

"Do you want the rest of this mouse? It tastes gamey to me."