Not-so-punctual Partner Gifts

'Your wife came by and left a message'

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

Employee attending a breakfast meeting in his pyjamas.

'The trouble with punctuality is that it makes the day so long!'

'Sir, that efficiency expert you hired called -- he said he'll be five hours late.

"My husband finally taught him to use the toilet but can't convince him to give up kitty litter."

"Help! Set me free!"

Big Ben

"So we`re going out and you haven`t even bothered to change?"

"You're so consistently late that you're pretty much doing my job and docking your own hours."

If you should be in this meeting, but are reading this instead - you're fired!

"Finally! I got all my deliveries done on time! I also put all the oil cans on the oil can shelves! And I actually put batteries in the battery display!"

Late for a date,,,

'That's Watson, away on the stroke of five as usual.'

'Sorry I'm late!'

"Is that a new watch?"

"Yea yea, I'm right around the corner!"

'You're late for our meeting again'

"Sorry I'm late for the breakfast meeting."

You're 22 hours early, Lance. I thought I was two hours late. Which do you prefer?

"Congratulations on your retirement Spencer. The team suggested a gold watch but I thought it more apt if I present you with the office clock you've been watching so much for the past 35 years."

"You're late."

"I should've done this years ago. All the good ones got taken."

"That's the spirit! Perkins has never been late in twenty years!"

'In our thirty twon years of marriage this is the first time Barney's been late for work.'

'Yes, I'm settling out of court.'

'Sorry if I'm late.'

"You're early."

"I like getting to work on time. I just wish someone was here to appreciate it."

"The time management consultant called. He'll be a little late."

The 'Time Management' consultant rang to say she double booked and she's going to be late!"

Justin Time

'We need to talk about your time-keeping.'

"Hey hon, don't wait up. They too the handcuffs and leather whip away from me at security."