Nostalgic Ninja Gifts

"Cowabunga! Guess whose arthritis just kicked in? Advanced age, mutant ninja turtles"

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

"String ... you mean it doesn't have a remote controller to operate it?"

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

Before the Internet

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

'I don't care what the Hares have. Dial-Up is good enough for us!'

'Bring out yer books!'

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

Inside One's Memory Bank

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

Old rocker.

'Jerry's 'old school'.'

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

"I can remember when having a '212' phone number still meant something in this world."

Fun (circa 1955)

'New Game'

The Paper Route

'Thirty years from now, this will seem terribly quaint and awash in charming period detail.'

Three kids in a trench coat, twenty years later.

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

Before pagers,mobile phones and the internet.

"I'm thinking of getting the old band back together."