Nostalgic Gourmet Gifts

"Your old Jewish mother with some pickled herring, sir. To remind you of your roots,"

"All our vegetables are well done. It's a return to the old values."

'Tastes just like the cans of soup my Mom used to open and heat.'

Hashimoto's Restaurant - Sushi Like Mother Used to Make!

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

Old Spice

"D'you remember caramel before it all became 'salted?'"

"It's my family's special recipe, passed down through generations on the cream cheese package."

Old fashioned Christmas shopping

"Ah! dehydrogenated non-milk fat solids with a soupcon of deoxyhydropesane and sweetners...just like mum used to make."

Scales

Griller highlights never gets old

'Tastes just like my mother's pies because she too made hers from a mix.'

Mom & Pop General Store - Going Out of Business Slowly But Surely

'Here go, Thegla... It recipe you ask for.'

"So nice to see things 'a la financiere' again."

"Who gets what?"

Okay. Grandma made her pie from scratch. Let's all pretend it's as good as the frozen kind.

'Oh please uncle Jim! Tell us another creepy story of the living!'

"I'm trying to stick to a Paleo diet. Do you think cavemen had wasabi sauce on their sushi?"

"Cheese fondue has gone wherever crepes Suzette and tuna Mornay went."

"Sometimes I come up here and think about the great meals I've eaten."

Why Shirley hates to eat genetic modified Broccoli.

"Coot. How many times has he said that?"

How did I go from the 3 martini power lunch to the low-carb 3 grain power bar?

"mmmmm. Now that's takeaway the way my mother used to order."

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

'It's just Frank's ghost returning for a bottle of wine. It doesn't tend to keep well, where he ended up.'

'I know for a fact my grandma never used propylene glycol monoesters, polysorbates, sorbitan monostearate and di-glycerides.'

'...and tell the butcher I want the biggest, fattest Christmas goose...' '...the Health Dept. shut him down.'

"Red wine with fish? Do you take me as some kind of a monster?!"

'What was the best thing before sliced bread?'

We still prepare our food the old fashioned way...from a can!

Recipes from the Revised Senior Citizen Cookbook

"By golly, this tastes just like Mom used to make...she couldn't cook either!"