Nostalgic Conversationalist Gifts

'I miss the good old days when all we had to worry about was nouns and verbs.'

"Of course we've already had this conversation. There isn't a conversation we haven't already had."

"Meanwhile, in the Memory Care Unit... I said, your secret’s safe with me."

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

"Hipsters"

Toy Shops and Educated Children

Letter Collecting Nerd

'It's worse than we thought: You've got termites.'

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

"Trump vs Biden. Chiefs vs 49ers. On the brink of war with Iran. Didn't we do this all in 2020?"

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

"We've intended to ask you about it for some time, Doctor, but never got around to it."

Wizard of Oz - repeat fees

How Grandma Sees the Remote

"Back in my day, kids had a little respect for the law of gravity."

"I've learned from the past. Now can we move on?"

'Call Me Old-Fashioned, But I Liked It Better When They Didn't Shave Their Armpits.'

Man hitting a TV and going out of focus himself.

'Lost Diary'

'Remember the good old days when the research department consisted of some studious types with a stack of annual reports?'

"Hi..just ringing to see if you got my e-mail?"

"Hi Mom...do you remember in which grade I was given an award for my excellent performance of the song about little ducks?"

'Sir, we need to upgrade our technology. We've used up our last roll of ticker tape.'

'Do you feel as foolish as I do, having a conference with Billy's teaching machine?'

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Horsekeeping - No. X.

"I enjoy books a lot more now that I can consistently color inside the lines."

Old Man Journal

'Humph! When I was your age, I had to do my homework in front of a black and white.'

Four Stages of Communication: Tell, Bell, Cell, Hell.

'How kids really saw Mr Robinson in computer classes.'

'I still love those classic solos from the 70s - but who has the time?'

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

"I must be getting old. I've forgotten why I came down the stairs."

'I must admit, this family reunion hasn't really lived up to my expectations.'