Norm-defiers Gifts

I had my shirt on backward all day. Why didn't you tell me?! I was too busy being impressed, little buddy. You were defying social norms. Walking to the beat of your own drummer. Soaring to the flapping of your own wings. When I see a man with his short on backward, I don't correct him. I applaud him. How about when you see a woman with her shirt on backward? I applaud her too, even though there's an increased risk of misunderstanding-related slappage.

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

"You'll never make it as a doctor with handwriting like this. I understood every word."

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

'Sorry, Jimmy... our school has a strict 'don't show, don't tell' policy!'

Victorian woman at a bar.

"One night in a moment of rage. . . I removed a 'Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law' tag from a pillow!"

"Just be proud we're the first father-son ice dancing team."

It says, "In lieu of gifts, please consider a donation to the automaker of your choice." Invite!

"It's very sensitive of you to realize that men like to get flowers!"

'-and stop saying 'who's carrying who over the threshold?''

A Woman Asking The Father's Permission To Marry His Son.

"While your idea is novel and innovative, it questions the status quo and can harm those entrenched in this organization. I'm ruling it out as being too disruptive."

"I'm tired of being the cockroach you want me to be and not the cockroach I want to be."

'I would appreciate it if you don't call out in class.'

'Boy, when they say one trip salad bar, they MEAN one trip salad bar!'

"Sigurd advocates civil disobedience relating to the 'law of gravity'."

'Mother! Would you stop referring to Charles as a latchkey husband!'

'Just who the heck are you to decide who's naughty or nice? Quit trying to impose your ideas of morality on everyone else!!'

"Don't, son – once they cross over into meats, they're out of our jurisdiction."

"It's Spring. I'm wearing it."

Wild Bill Hickok. Really wild Bill Hickok

Man in top hat at pedestrian crossing, sign says 'Don't dance'.

"No you weren't disturbing us, we were just having sex."

'So... shall I put you down as a Miss, a Mrs, a Ms or a miffed?'

'Son, you need to get your priorities wrong.'

"I am here on behalf of a concerned caller, why are you wearing shorts in winter?"

'No, it's not my diploma. I dropped out. It's my birth certificate.'

"I bet they're not so much commandments as best practice guidelines, am I right?"

"It's been a year. Seriously. No one cares anymore."

On the beach

"Please scream inside your heart"

'Ms. Hempworth, check with our legal department...why must we obey the rules?'

Fishing Strictly Prohibited.

"How long do we have to be together before everyone finally stops asking us when we're having kids?"