Noise Management Enthusiasts Gifts

Midwife presents a baby with its own volume control: 'Finally, evolution has done its thing.'

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

'I'm going to drag my sled up and down the sidewalk until the noise drives nature crazy and it snows.'

Future garbage truck driver.

"Let's save a few so we can continue to piss off the neighbors for the next few weeks."

"I'll stop when I'm good and ready to."

'You haven't heard anything yet!'

'Don't forget to take your tranquilizers Daddy, little Jimmy is coming round to play.'

Wake the eff up with the official New York City alarm clock. Choose your distress signal: car horns, sirens, barking, heat pipes, mouse feet. Guaranteed to disturb!

Cat and Broom

"Threatening to call the Noise Abatement Society isn't being very romantic, Sydney."

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

Library Grand Opening

"Now that's what I call a sound system."

"In this one, I can hear the sound of traffic."

"Vuuuuuuuuuuu!"

Playing dustbins

A question you can't ask at a football game - 'Has anyone lost their keys?'

Ambulance Paramedic making the 'Nee Naw' noise.

Communication

"Mmm... now WHERE did i leave my radio..?"

"Sorry for the racket, but, I ask you, how are ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm after they've seen 6-B?"

Coping during the 6 weeks school holidays.

"Here's the deal. I'll stop playing my bagpipes when you stop playing your banjo."

Lawn Mowers - Loud/Louder/Loudest

Novel airport noise abatement procedures.

"Hello dear- couldn't you sleep either?"

"You don't like my new whistle?"

'Your Dad phoned earlier and told me that this is how he wanted it fixed.'

"Sorry - is my snoring driving you nuts?"

'Will you turn off your Hi-Fi'

'I play it to kill time.'

'Hey! Kid in the blue! Where'd you get that BEER?'

The partners demonstrated their enthusiasm for open plan.