Nocturnal Humorist Pillows

Man's dentures hold cigar.

"Jeff, wake up. I just remembered what I was furious at you for."

'I'm getting kind of tired of working so much at night.'

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

Macbeth: Take Two

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

'Your night writing book, madam.'

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

Job Safety - Pumpkin.

The following is a paid political announcement.

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

Fancy a pint?

"I don't like space."

'You complete me.'

'I'm dressed as a vat inspector.'

"You've got to help her ... she has developed a fear of flying."

A few Halloween costume ideas.

"By the way, does anything other than 'trouble' rhyme with 'bubble'?"

'Been biting drunken bitches again, have we?'

"I'm the ghost of clumsy past."

'Listen up, you ghoul fools, at midnight the mummy takes off the wrappings! Heh heh - just kidding folks, but seriously...'

Halloween sculptor

"I'm the Grin Reaper."

"We pay the living dead wage."

"Whadd ya wanna be for Halloween, Bro?"

"Wow. I just had a near life experience!"

Candy Corn Dracula