Noble Gas Appreciator Pillows

'With just a soupçon of argon.'

Surreal ale

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

"Oh, oh - it's getting into organic."

'Increase your beer volume sales by filling the glasses up.'

"I keep thinking I'm a noble gas."

"'Just a drive and a putt' you said. This is going to have to be one hell of a putt, Fred!"

'I suggest you move onto halves...'

"Yeah, I'll say that's a good head, now is there any chance you can put ome beer under it?"

Monk growing flowers which look like his tonsure.

"Your cousin Hernando is such a handful! He's been walking ever since he was ten months old!"

"You definately have a musical ear"

A ship's captain stranded on an iceberg with a hungry polar bear.

'Be gentle with me it's my first time!'

Deadpan Delivery.

"Enjoy your youth. Soon you'll be an old cynic like me with nothing worth barking at."

Perpetual Motion.

"It's the price we pay for living an alternative lifestyle."

'I'm worried Tom has a drinking problem.'

Standing ovation $5.

"So...you have a boyfriend?"

"If this beer had a head it would hang it in shame."

Bertrand Russell.

'This is my original eighties designer stubble.'

"I think we retire too many numbers."

"Well, that was a waste of Monet..."

"....but it doesn't half get in the way on the bike."

'Unfortunately sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel isn't all it at first seems...''