Nicotine Quitter Gifts

Woman throwing away smoking accessories

Dear Diary...just Quit Smoking.

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

Top Ten New Year's Resolutions

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

'I'm worried. I gave up smoking without any trouble.'

"Can we get some more nicotine patches, pal?"

"Bye! good luck with the 'stop smoking 'campaign!"

'You're meant to take off the old nicotine patches before putting on a new one!'

"They're infantilizing us!"

The trouble with trying to quit smoking.

"I see you went to the hypnotherapist"

'It's a side effect of giving up smoking.'

Turkey...cold turkey.

I'm giving you a prescription for hard-to-remove stop smoking patches. Place one over the opening of every pack of cigarettes you buy.

He had tried many ways to quit smoking but only one worked.

I smoked for thirty years but I've given it up....

Smokers.

'Oh man, I should really give up smoking!'

"There's nothing wrong with my eye. It's a nicotine patch."

'This nicotine patch is guaranteed to make you stop smoking.'

'If you stop smoking now, you will add three years to your life. Since you are a lawyer, that's about six thousand billable hours.'

'Yeah. . . but it really helped me quit smoking.'

'I quit smoking weeks ago but Bruno didn't want to go along with the program.'

"Give up? Do you realise how hard it was to start?"

'I don't smoke. My doctor told me I need to get outside more.'

The Surgeon General's Army

Eric's nicotine patches were working!

The psychology behind your desire to quit caffeine is fascinating. You say it's because you worry caffeine makes you a high-strung, ranting liberal but I think there's more going on. You'd rather blame caffeine than blame Hannity, Ingraham and other conservatives. If they're responsible for your rants then you've put them in control of your life. Analogously, I don't credit Jessica Simpson with my insomnia. How does this meathead come up with this stuff?

'I gave up smoking.'

Man carring plans

'You don't fully understand this nicotine patch idea, do you?.'

'Stop smoking. Cut back on your drinking and stay off the floor of the stock exchange.'

'You smoke, we'll do the rest! Okay?'