Niche Media Aficionado Gifts

This week in tentacles

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

"They grow up so fast."

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"Extreme miming"

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

'Desert island cartoons - and you?'

Oligarchy

Television Readers.

"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

Create some buzz!

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

"Bloody hell!"

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

Kritik's Korner

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

Canadian film production

Man Reading Laptop.

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

Moby Dick

Treasure Island Book.

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

'I'll blurb you if you'll blurb me.'

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

"You can tell it's a period drama because they're not wearing ozone helmets."

Fear of news.