Newborn Enthusiasts Gifts

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

'Congratulations guys! It's a Buoy!'

"Of course what else would it be?"

A midwife holding a baby

'The child is very illogical'

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

'Boy, if you'd just stop roaming around, it would be easier to find you...'

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

'Hey, big deal! We're all new kids on the block!'

"They look so young and helpless."

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

Maternity Ward

'How many fingers do you see?'

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

Uterus: One size fits all.

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

Bouncing baby

Giving Birth

Maternity Hospital

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'

"Congratulations! It's a pass."

'We got Spot and Fluffy when it rained cats and dogs. You came in a baby shower.'