New Baby Enthusiast Gifts

'Thanks for the flowers.' (balloon reads 'not another one'.)

Gifts for a cloned baby!

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'No. no. When your wife asked you to change the baby, she meant the diaper.'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Whoa

'Boy, if you'd just stop roaming around, it would be easier to find you...'

I'm accused of kicking you in the womb, but your evidence is purely circumstantial. Lawyer baby.

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

'Hey, big deal! We're all new kids on the block!'

Batman's Baby

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

Maternity Ward

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

'How many fingers do you see?'

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

Uterus: One size fits all.

'He's more supportive after his nap.'

'Mom is feeling sick. She caught a baby.'

Bouncing baby

Giving Birth

'We got Spot and Fluffy when it rained cats and dogs. You came in a baby shower.'

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'