New Pet Acquisition Gifts

"Garbage in, garbage out!"

'I'll take this one.'

"Sure I'm depressed - now they got me on this geriatric dog food."

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

"Actually, make that a double cream."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

"Foster failure"

"Cat box"

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

'That was fun!'

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

Dog Dreams

"Can I keep them? I found him on the internet?"

Cat Nip.

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink in the wild air." — Ralph Waldo Emerson "Catch tennis balls in the mouth." — Me

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

'Why can't my walks be that fun?'

A man and his dog

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

Foster failure

"That’s great, but where’s the Frisbee?!"

He won't sit, but he heels well.

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

Happy.

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

Family with pets.