New Moms Loving Adventures Gifts

"Support the head."

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

Mother Nature

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

Whoa

'We found you in a cabbage!'

Fitness Programme for babies

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

'Hey Kiddo, I think we'll have to stop to change your nappy...'

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: This is solids?

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

'Ugh Not Again!'

'She just came down the stairs without walking.'

Breastfeeding: Good Design Council

Kids really do make you view the world from a different perspective...I'm on the floor, behind the couch, under the bed...

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

"The main skill you need in parenting, is the ability to surreptitiously eat chocolate."

'The Fashionable Mamma, or The Convenience of Modern Dress'

Moms gone wild

'All I want for Christmas is my old shape back again.'

Maternity Hospital

"I'm sure he wasn't that big when we went out

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

'This is a rarity in today's world. No corporate sponsorship signs in here.'