New Mom Supporter Gifts

'Superbaby...More powerful than an electric breast pump!'

Mother tells her daughter that she needs to get out more.

"I'd love to be a stay at home mum, but I'll get into so much trouble if I miss any more school."

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

Cry babies.

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

Mother Nature

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

Fitness Programme for babies

'We found you in a cabbage!'

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

"I'm so good at this!"

'Three kids, full-time job, night classes and coaches a girls basketball team. She's stretched a little thin.'

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

'Ugh Not Again!'

Why all mothers deserve a special day.

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

Breastfeeding: Good Design Council

Kids really do make you view the world from a different perspective...I'm on the floor, behind the couch, under the bed...

'I think it may be a limited edition.'

Moms gone wild

'The Fashionable Mamma, or The Convenience of Modern Dress'

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

"I'm sure he wasn't that big when we went out

'All I want for Christmas is my old shape back again.'

"The main skill you need in parenting, is the ability to surreptitiously eat chocolate."