New Mom's Time Capsule Pillows

Mother at the Doctors.

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

Mother Nature

'We found you in a cabbage!'

Fitness Programme for babies

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

"You got the dolls yesterday? My mom says I took nine months!"

"I said, was... it... a... difficult... birth?"

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

Woman as a beacon and guide of the family

'Ugh Not Again!'

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

Kids really do make you view the world from a different perspective...I'm on the floor, behind the couch, under the bed...

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

Breastfeeding: Good Design Council

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

'This is a rarity in today's world. No corporate sponsorship signs in here.'

"The main skill you need in parenting, is the ability to surreptitiously eat chocolate."

'All I want for Christmas is my old shape back again.'

Moms gone wild

Maternity tattoos

"I'm sure he wasn't that big when we went out

'I think it may be a limited edition.'