New Mom On The Docket Gifts

"I don't think it's ever too soon to retain an attorney, nut I think your baby should wait until at least the 2nd trimester."

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

Mother Nature

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

'Your CV says in your last job you were responsible for...'

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

A postwoman delivers mail together with her baby who is riding in the letter carrier.

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

'Ugh Not Again!'

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

Why all mothers deserve a special day.

The Mothership

Breastfeeding: Good Design Council

Kids really do make you view the world from a different perspective...I'm on the floor, behind the couch, under the bed...

"I'm sure he wasn't that big when we went out

Moms gone wild

'The Fashionable Mamma, or The Convenience of Modern Dress'

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

'All I want for Christmas is my old shape back again.'

'This is a rarity in today's world. No corporate sponsorship signs in here.'

"The main skill you need in parenting, is the ability to surreptitiously eat chocolate."

Baby At The Entrance Of The Maze Of Life

"They also left a pamphlet on the benefits of breast feeding."