New Jersey Navigator T-Shirts

"So how does that eightfold path get us back on the Garden State?"

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Are we there yet?'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

"Yes, Jane Lyons, sitting next to Katy Jones, class of 2018, it is important for a writer to know her audience."

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

"I am not asking for directions."

Titanic: How's my steering.

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

"Well - I've either bought a pack of table napkins, or adopted a Siberian tiger cub..."

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

Battery Lighthouse

"It's a jungle out there... and I hear you're an expert."

Newspaper suicide.

'I didn't write the book report. I downloaded and printed it directly from the Internet, but I did collate and staple it myself.'

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

'I'm in the den, mom, reading the newspaper for my social studies class.'

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"Who should we have at eye level this month?"

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

"Yeah, I have a GPS, but I have no idea where 120 degrees longitude and 80 degrees latitude is."

"According to the map, we should be nearing the North Pole, but something tells me we’ve been reading the map upside down."

"For pity's sake, George - stop tooting and ask for directions!"

'Right, I hope that gives you an idea of what the work is about, any questions?'

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."