New Beginnings Ponderer T-Shirts

'Just thinking about New Year's resolutions makes me tired.'

The fate of the emigrant

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

"Hey, just wanted to say bye again, guys, I'm off to join the circus."

Totalitarian Humour

So You've Cloned Yourself

"The first day of school. Yes sir. A day to make new friends. A day to mark new beginnings. A day to discover everyone but you has grown three feet over the summer."

'Adam seems depressed - He needs camaraderie or something.'

"Don't you worry about me. I always land on my feet."

Great doing business with you. I look forward to next year.

"Hon, I'm taking your advice and starting a new chapter."

"It makes me happy that you took time to read the newspaper today."

"What's with kids nowadays? Walking upright's not good enough for you?"

"Oh, don't mind us... We just want to make sure it's really dead."

"Sure, but what have you invented lately?"

Springtime rabbits.

Janus 2021

Happy Days are here again

At the Brew-haha Comedy Club

Been there. Done that. (Man stands between two doors.)

'This may be the first day of the rest of my life, but I've decided to wait for the second day.'

Off to a bad start.

No, no, don't tell me … you lost weight? You cut your hair? Wait, did you used to wear glasses?

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

"The fact that you're here means you will continue to make poor life decisions."

"It's from HQ, they're replacing me with a younger man!"

"This little piggy goes to the market. . ."

"Today is the day I start the new me!"

"You get a white robe, a halo, wings, and of course, free WIFI."

"I can't help thinking there's a book in this."

"Well, for starters, Matt has been showing definite improvement in risk-taking."

'Though we must innovate, and though we must grow, we must never lose sight of our core mediocrities.'