Present Ponderer T-Shirts

'I had more last year!'

'Remember to include all the sales receipts in case I change my mind.'

'I had more last year.'

Santa Amazon and the Christmas slaves were diligent again.

Historical memory is on life support.

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

'Why don't you try seeing it from your point of view?'

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

"May I offer a very different scenario?"

Totalitarian Humour

'At least I don't have his life.'

'We never had all these labour-saving devices in my young day!'

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

"Definitive." "Compelling." "Persuasive." "Upside down."

'Egad! It's the ghosts of sanity past!'

"I'll have dessert first."

'Congratulations, you've got the job. Unfortunately though, you'll be constantly late, and we'll fire you in two months.'

Artist chained to his drawing.

'In this next precedent, an attorney lost his frivolous lawsuit complaint and his opponent then filed a frivolous 'frivolous lawsuit' lawsuit.'

'I say we try it.'

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

"I think you're suffering from nostalgia, Mr. Prentice."

"What's with kids nowadays? Walking upright's not good enough for you?"

"Sure, but what have you invented lately?"

Sign pointing to 'hindsight' and 'foresight'

The sad case of the blind-men and the elephant.

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

Truth

"The fact that you're here means you will continue to make poor life decisions."

'He's always looking for an argument!'

Lady Jane Grey

'The hardest part of being a street crazy is picking each day's sign.'

History Department: 'I used to be a revisionist myself, you know!'