New Addition To The Family Gifts

Family working together

A woman looks at greeting cards in a section entitled "New Pie".

'The little ones are hatching! Quick, get the camcorder.'

"My wife tells me the bee has struck again!"

"No, I'm telling you, large families are great: you always have somebody to play with..."

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"Pick me!"

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

Raised by Dogs

'We found you in a cabbage!'

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

'So far I've found out the doctor had something to do with it.'

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

'It's going to be a vegan.'

'What's that humming sound?'

Stork and baby discover scarecrows

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"Having a cat will prepare us for having a teenager one day."

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."

"I don't get it! They're both diurnal, so why on earth would they bring back from the hospital a baby that's awake all night?"

Dummies for Dummies.

"Congratulations. It's a litter."

"I can hardly wait for him to start leading a life of quiet desperation."

Same sex families - it's about love, not sex, after all...

Someone's going to have to tell him he's adopted...

"The Ugly Duckling didn't know why he was so attracted to swan culture."

Family sitting on sofa.

'Breasts can be so rude. So often they start without me.'

Untidy bedroom

"it's just... we're too lazy to have any of our own."

'It's one of life's little miracles!'

'Fred, we've been together too long!'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- it's hard to believe we're related.'