Neglected Partner's Club Gifts

Cricket wife's revenge 9

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

"My wife left me. Then my hard drive died."

ONE HORSE TOWN

Gym. Check in Here. The only time I feel the burn is when I pay the memberbship fee.

Drinking Companions

'The answer is still no. I may look like a pushover, but I'm not.'

Table for two. Whom does sir think he's kidding? You're right table for one. Menu.

'And the winner of the 'biggest loser in love' category is...'

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"Well, one good thing about summer...is I work more hours and make a lot more money. The bad thing is...I have a lot more free time to spend it all."

"Since no one showed up, I'll keep my remarks brief."

Snub Marine

"Don't even start, Claire. You knew I was a snake when you took me in."

'Sigh - Yes, I will probably be dying alone.'

"I provided the comic relief and said all the right things like 'Yee haw!' And 'You got that right, boss!' . . . But he ditched me anyway!"

'I HATE Spring cleaning!'

Late again.

"Sure, it's disgusting, but it's nice to have something that needs me."

"You'll make a good first wife."

Insert Bad Life Here

"Congratulations, sir, you've outlived the lot of them!"

'This next song's for anyone who's feeling a little lonely right now.'

Herbert can't read, Janice can't jump, but together they can rule the world!

"I'd like to be on time for school but it makes the day too long!"

'I had a very lonely childhood. I was an only twin.'

'Poor fellow. One really is the loneliest number.'

Hunters And Gatherers Without Partners.

"Do you realise, Bernard, that in sixty-five years you've never once called me babe?"

"I like these northern soul clubs but where do I put me whippet?"

'I find I'm talking to myself a lot these days.'

'Eat at my place, I'm very lonely'

Every year at the annual 'MoveOn Swim Day', Dan really regretted having dated Grasie Wallace in high school.

'Oh, it's from my new pen pal on the other island.'