Navigators Of Chaos T-Shirts

All-way stops.

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

Emergency Phone.

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

Woman with kids at husbands office.

Stubborn Horse

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

"Mom, can you come get me?"

Signs of Stress

'Oh no. Another major code violation decision.'

A dream of consequence

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'

Try not to worry.

"Boy, has it been hacked!"

Having It All

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

You can't focus on the cost of raising a child. True. They do have benefits. Mom! The glue spilled into your underwear drawer! Dad! Where's the toilet plunger? Though nothing specific leaps to mind.

"Have you heard of Murphy's Law 2.0? It's anything that could possibly go wrong often does...as well as a thing or two that couldn't possibly go wrong."

Careful

'If anyone's still interested, the definition of entropy is ^,'

'Your mother and I want you to know that you wouldn't be hurting our feelings if you decided not to go to University.'

Tax Department - Whammy/double whammy

Department to Control Government Growth - 'We need more room.'

Going to the pub with kids...

Married Life - Poet unable to write because of noisy children

"How did his last remark make you feel?"

"How long have you had this nightmare of being shot down by a beagle on a flying doghouse, Herr Von Richthofen?"

"Don't worry. I'll be right back. I just need a little space."

"We'll have to pick this up later. My plane just went down, sharks ate my personal assistant, and apparently I'm winning some kind of surfing competition."

"Please wait while I load up software you'll never use and stick random icons all over the place."