Navigation Humorists Gifts

"Next time, forget the breadcrumbs and just ask for directions."

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

Bicycle sat nav.

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

Recalculating

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

Island of Lost Guys.

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

Walking the Plank.

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

Man painting MOM on boat

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

Confused drivers

A series of Exit signs.

'We're drifting apart.'

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

'I'm not scaring the fish - I'm WARNING the fish!'

"Hey wader, there's a fly in my sloop"

Fish near-death experiences.

'That's his new trophy fishwife.'

Contended beaver nurses a full stomach having eaten the captains wooden leg.

Sinking cruise ship, with band member saved by floating on cello.

The Conveyance of a Corkscrew Hand

'Of course being on short term contract, I don't enjoy the same benefits as the rest of you.'

"I know your rations include two limes a day, but please don't do that with them."

"These aren't barnacles. Someone stuck their gum down here."

CAPTAIN PLUNGER. Colour

'Give it to me straight, doctor - is it Dutch Elm Disease?