Naval Architect T-Shirts

Ship's anchor with drainplug.

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

"So far we've narrowed the choice of names down to either Fearnaught or HMS Arsekicker."

20,000 Leagues under the sea.

'I've always admired Gary's penmanship.'

Servicemen.

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

Young Picasso at the Beach

Water Gardening: One thing is certain - you will find the peace and tranquility of water an almost irresistible attraction.

Building Sandcastles.

"You can build it with me, but you can't wreck it with me."

"Then, after college, I joined the navy. Wait, I think I hear him coming."

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

'Sophie has discovered Gehry.'

Says here the Navy's going to be patrolling the South China Sea. It could spark a history-changing war. Google tells me the last time a Naval conflict changed history, it was the Battle of Midway. You were alive at that time. How awesome was it to already be ancient when Midway happened? I never expected a question like that from a prepubescent stooge like you. Was it as awesome as when you saw Cleopatra lose at the Battle of Actium? I see you're bringing Google's a-game today.

'It's not so much the distance to your proposed house site, but that I'm not familiar with your planet's building codes.'

COWMIKAZES

"This aquarium is such a nice prison."

'So what have you been up to?'

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

A large yacht carries a small wood house.

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

'I thought I knew what a cubit was.'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

'It's a long and narrow home: A perfect fit for you Mr Eel...'

"He lives in a block of flats"

AUKUS Deal Annoys France

Commonly confused homonyms: Frigate and Frigate

"I hope we can flip it before the tide comes in."

'Okay who swiped my bath toys?'

"Sir, our hood ornament is slowing us down."

'It was only a joke. I never thought they's accept me.'

'Think about it: If we blow up the bridge, they'll have to swim across again...'

On board the MS Hepatology

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'