Nautical Wordplay Enthusiast Gifts

"#*@!% #*@!% #*@!%"

"Do you still think it was witty to name your yacht, Titanic 2?"

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Staff support"

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

Punt Cake

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

Lesser known greek gods,

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

Please Drove Carefully.

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

"Out damn Spot

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

Wordplay: In The Bag.

AA Meeting Here Today

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"Privates Beach"

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

"Nuts to you, too."